Dear U.S. Air:
I know all you airlines have fallen upon hard times lately. Could be due to the outrageous price of flights. I'm just sayin'.
But since you're keeping up with the gas prices, you might like to keep up with technology, too. I mean, I'm not the world's most tech-saavy person, and I'm using Mozilla Firefox, so maybe you should upgrade your site to be friendly with it. When I was trying to book flights to my friend Jenn's wedding, I got to that page where all my flights were showing and I was inputting names for the tickets. This all sounds very simple to you, I'm sure, but as I'm flying out of a small airport into an airport that doesn't have any of the carriers that are flying out of said small airport, figuring out the connecting flights and when would be enough time to arrive (because, you know, there's always a chance that one of your airline pilots will oversleep or leave his pilot's license in his other pants and delay the flight), I'm thinking I might need to get another degree before I can book this flight. But there I was. Departing and return flights all ready to book. And it wouldn't let me select seats for the flights.
Now, for some people, this would be okay. But I don't like people. Especially people I don't know. I live in fear of those people who choose to ignore the indulgent copy of In Style that I purchased at the airport kiosk and proceed to tell me about their trip to visit their grandchildren. An airplane is just one of those places that all my humanity goes out the window. I don't care. I don't want to talk to you. We are not friends. And by the way, I'd like to sit with my boyfriend instead of Grandma Moses.
Luckily, my boyfriend is much smarter than I am and offered his laptop and the use of Internet Explorer, which, apparently, is a-okay with you. I finally completed my itenerary, seating chart, credit card information, my mother's maiden name, my first address, the first word spoken by my great grandmother's uncle's wife, ecetera, ad infinitum. So I really appreciate that after all that, I have to accept the terms of a carry-on bag no larger than 15" x 9" x 11". Awesome. I have purses that are bigger than this. I can hardly wait until we meet again.
Ciao,
Ash
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Why You Gotta Be So Mean to Me?
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4 cat calls:
Ugh. . . what a pain in the ass! Sorry it was such a hassle. I hope the rest of your trip is smooth sailing (or flying, or whatever). Can't wait to see you!
On my flight back from NY last month, they forced me to turn over my new lip gloss. My pretty, two-day-old lip gloss with a cute name like "coral cola" which I spent an hour picking out at the Sephora in SoHo.
I cried most of way home.
Let this be a warning to other lip gloss savvy girls. Safe travels!
Because there were secretly the makings of a bomb in that coral cola? OMG!
I've decided I no longer like airports, airplanes, and the whole affair in general.
I'm so worried about all the security parameters. I mean, there are some times when lost luggage and lack of toiletries is an inconvenience. But when you're going to a wedding, it's like, you need your dress and shoes. I can't wear a St. Louis t-shirt down the aisle. And really. I don't want to blow up the plane. I just want to be able to lather, rinse, repeat.
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