A Dear John Letter

Dear John:
I stayed up really late to see you on The Tonight Show last night. And that's a sacrifice for a working girl like me (especially when my neighbor was out on his porch shouting AGAIN at 6 AM this morning, but that's another story). Your performance did not disappoint, but, John, dear, what were you wearing? Seriously, this is national television, and you kind of looked like you just got out of bed. That long robe-y looking coat and the pajama pants and those Chuck Taylors that looked - dare I say it - like platform sneakers? You looked a bit disheveled.

Did you check out the guy next to you before you went on stage? Your backup vocal guitar player? He was wearing a shirt and tie and pressed pants and looked rather dapper. And I know that's not you, but look at this picture I found of you - this is much, much better. A nice t-shirt, some rock star jeans, and that guitar is fabulous.

So anyway, John, I just wanted to say, check yourself in the mirror next time. You're a good-looking guy - I know you can work it. But stellar performance. That guitar solo was hot. And you've won me over on the new hair. Love the new album. Keep up the good work.

XOXO,
Ash