Monday, September 24, 2007

Handle It

handle: (noun, slang) a name by which a thing is known, described or explained; nickname
Let's call it indigestion, ulcer, acid reflux, "nervous stomach", under the weather, PMS, too much ice cream. An episode. An inconvenience. (Try to laugh about it later.)

handle: (verb) to manage, direct, train or control
Take double-shots of Alka Seltzer, Pepcid AC, Zantac. Crunch Tums like candy. Turn to exercise -- copious amounts of exercise. Lose ten pounds. Go to bed early.

handle: (noun) that which may be grasped as to understand another thing; a key
Examine the symptoms closely. From under the rubble, you may hear a whisper, a single hieroglyph to unlock the Rosetta Stone.

handle: (noun) a part of a thing made specifically to be grasped
It is slippery smooth and shapeless, and just when you think you can grab hold, your fingers close around a wisp of smoke. In your determination to excavate it, you may find that it is not a thing to be found.

handle: (verb) to deal or trade in
I handle broken thoughts, waiting, overanalysis, fragility.

handle: (noun) the total amount wagered in an event
Absolutely everything. I gambled it all to be here.

handle: (verb) to behave or perform in a particular way when operated
Under the circumstances, in the grand leap from one place to the next, I find that I don't handle well at zero gravity. Sputtering and shaky, I'm unreliable at best.

handle: (verb) to touch, pick up or carry
I handle loneliness.

fly off the handle: (idiom) to become very agitated without adequate warning or reason
Cracked.

handle: (verb) to manage, deal with or be responsible for; cope
Begin the search for equilibrium - set out on the quest for an even keel. Map out a way to peace of mind, shepherding thoughts to greener pastures beside quiet waters. I ask kindly, "Restore my soul." And, yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, please, please comfort me.

9 cat calls:

Kim said...

Damn, you're such a good writer-- this post is beyond awesome. That is all. No funny comment to follow, just praise.

Anonymous said...

I second that!

mendacious said...

i absolutely-love the-handle recipe.

the end reminded me of lamentations- of course good ole psalms but still- 3:19- "i remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. i well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. yet this i call to mind and therefore i have hope: because of the lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. they are new every morning..." ; )

Ruby said...

Wow. You have some kind of talent.

Kurt said...

I love the Devil's Dictionary.

penelope said...

Even though things feel sucky right now, take comfort in that you are rocking the blogfront. Another fantastic entry.

ashley said...

Thanks, folks. It gives me a boost to know that I'm at least pumping the creative juices.

And M, what a lovely reminder. I've been looking in Ecclesiastes for wisdom, but perhaps Lamentations is where it's at.

Cue said...

So well said. Just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you, sending hugs and well-wishes.

hat said...

where and when do we get your version of Job's I-am-righteous-and-faithful-and-brave-and-deserving-of-love-assurance-wisdom-respect-and-have-proven-myself-more-than-adequately-that-I-can-handle-all-afflictions-cast-my-way.

look to Job, too. hang in there, friend.