I am now fairly recovered from The Yelch - which included a raging case of viral conjunctivitis. Or cold virus in the eye. Or weepy eyes all bloodshot and evil looking. This condition required me to wear my glasses to work on Friday.
I tried to be all chin-up about it, but I hate wearing glasses. The reasons are many - I don't see as well, tend to get eye strain, can't wear sunglasses. But the root of the problem is in the v-word. (Not that v-word.) Vanity.
I started wearing glasses around 2nd grade. Blue and amber shaded glasses with a tiny red strawberry on the arm for Strawberry Shortcake. The next pair of glasses were giant and pink, a la Sally Jesse Raphael (see photographic evidence). And then some over-sized gold frames, followed by a very studious pair of tobacco-colored wire rims. No matter the frames, how very cool or stylish they seemed when I picked them out, I was always four eyes.
It's my own hang-up, I know, for my glasses now are very lovely thin caramel rectangle frames that complement my face nicely. But I still hate them. Putting them on is like putting on an old identity - a Clark Kent persona of squareness. Being a nerd. Uncool. Overlooked. The smart girl, and never, ever the pretty girl.
Even when the coworkers told me I looked hip or writerly or smart...I just felt 13. Awkward and somehow shy. And like someone else. Not myself. I realize how silly it is to let some molded plastic change the way I feel about myself...but there it is. It does. I tried to tamp down the insecurity, swallow the feeling that everyone was looking at me differently (it was most likely the evil-veined eyes and not the glasses), but by the time I got home, I was ready to be rid of four eyes and go back to plain old two.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Four Eyes
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This is SO me, every little bit of it. And when 12 & 13, I had the added insult of a) braces and b) the poor judgement to select plastic frames with red on just the top, clear on the bottom...like I had licorice eyebrows or something. I only wear my glasses just after waking up and right before bed if I'm reading, and I feel like a ginormous nerd, even though the frames are great. And, okay this is really bad--when I was pregnant with K.Lo, I remember looking up whether or not you could wear contacts in Labor and Delivery, because somehow I could not handle the idea of being large, ratty-haired, red-faced, pushing out a baby, AND wearing my glasses. It would have been the straw that broke the camel's back.
But I tell people it's the sun, that it hurts my eyes when I wear glasses. Which is also true.
Girl. I love the picture evidence. And I am right there with both of you. I HATE wearing glasses, because it's a big pain and because I had the huge peach ones. plus, my sight is so bad, they had to be super thick. Now I pay for the thinner lens and have frames I like, but still do NOT like to have to wear them - strictly for getting to and from bed.
I, also, was highly concerned about having to wear glasses instead of contacts for labor/delivery!! Dellaina watches us put our contacts in and says, "when I get bigger, I wear tacts, too" and I just say, "I hope not" but if she does have bad eyesight, at least there are contact options over bad glasses.
hey you're HOT. both of you. come on. snap ho. glasses are totally the naughtly hot intellectual type. flirty, fun?! need i go on! pull it together women!
P.S. That picture of you is so adorable, I can't stand it.
I have the opposite reaction to my glasses. I didn't get glasses until my mid-20s (when I started need reading glasses) and I LOVE them. They make me feel smart and sexy and hip. Sometimes I wear them even when I don't really need them. But if I had lived with glasses in elementary school, I'm sure I'd have different feelings.
Um, yeah, so "started need" = "started needing." Oops.
word.
my glasses give me a headache. i can't get used to the depth perception - there's something weird about the lenses being so far away. you can't lay your head on a pillow. on top of all this, my glasses prescription is probably pre-2000, which means it REALLY doesn't match my real prescription, like at all, anymore, and should i get a cold in my eye requiring the wearing of the glasses for an extended period, well, i'd be screwed.
Where did my comment go?
Glad I'm not the only one suffering from a little vanity and insecurity. :) I think it probably does have something to do with the childhood association, Jenn. If you had a picture like that, you wouldn't love your glasses either. My glasses are your bangs. ;)
Kurt, did blogger eat your brilliance? It sometimes does that.
I hate my glasses too.
But I have something far better to share. A quote from a former student.....
Student: "Ms. Ray. My momma says I gots the pink eye, but I gots to come to school anyway."
My Immediate Thought: "No darlin'. You "gots" to go home."
Why do people send their kids to school with contagious diseases?!
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