Overcoming First Impressions*

When it was released, I adamantly vowed not to see the new version of Pride & Prejudice featuring Keira Knightley and not Colin Firth. But it happened to be on HBO this afternoon, and I started watching. Out of curiosity, really. You know, to compare it my beloved BBC miniseries and find it severely lacking.

I was begrudgingly surprised. Despite my protestations that Knightley was all wrong for the role of Elizabeth Bennett, she pulled it off swimmingly. She delivered a witty, complex performance and possibly brought out the flawed humanity of the character more so than other portrayals, in which Bennett becomes somewhat of an above-reproach heroine. I admit, they even accomplished making her look rather dowdy. And while Matthew Macfadyen is clearly not Colin Firth, his Darcy is well-played and appropriately stand-offish. A bit more vulnerable and yielding than Firth's ever is, for he does smile on several occasions during the film.

Overall, this film has a verve and energy to it that the BBC miniseries lacks, though the BBC version does cover the novel in its entirety more faithfully. Knightley, Macfadyen and fellow cast (including the illustrious Judy Dench as the deplorably pompous Lady Catherine de Bourg) draw the wit and comedy out of the story and more accurately depict the societal gaps between the various characters. Also, Simon Woods, who played Octavian in Season 2 of Rome delivers a performance quite the opposite of the confident dictator with his affable Mr. Bingley.

My only beef was the end scene added specifically to the American version that insinuates that we tacky Americans will never understand the passion of Elizabeth and Darcy without an implied sex scene...which, just doesn't really belong in this film. Still I confess...I'll be adding it to my DVD collection in short order. For like Elizabeth and Darcy, I'm not to proud to admit when I've been prejudiced.

* A postscript for any trivia lovers - First Impressions was Jane Austen's working title for the novel.

RuMANations

A girlie-girl prone to crushes since, oh, I don't know, birth, I've always had some celebrity that I secretly pined for - or not so secretly wrote on every notebook I carried. According to the same journal that charted my musical tastes, I've had crushes on the following celebrities:

Dean Cain (of Lois & Clark fame) * Chipper Jones (of the Atlanta Braves) * Adam Duritz (of Counting Crows) * Harrison Ford * Colin Firth * Michael Schoeffling (from Sixteen Candles, although my crush had more to do with the little-known Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken) * Hugh Jackman * Joshua Jackson * John Mayer...and I'm sure there were many, many more whose names I was smart enough to not catalog for future embarrassment.

But far more embarrassing than any of my past crushes is that, I must confess, I still get celebrity crushes. And they seem to come in threes. My current list of crushes includes:

*James Purefoy - British and delicious. If you missed HBO's Rome, you missed his incredibly witty and sexy portrayal of Mark Antony, you missed out. He's just rugged. And wicked. Great voice, too. A guy's never looked so hot shoving a sword into his gullet.

*Christian Bale - I know he was popular among my friends (a.k.a. NIKI!) when he was in Swing Kids. I thought he was cute then, but now? He's smoldering. He's got that mysterious quality. Best Bruce Wayne ever (and with the worst script of all of them).

*Mr. Armani - I tried to find out this guy's name, and the best I can do is find one site that names him Andrew Cooper. But I don't think that's right. So we'll just call him Mr. Armani. He's spearheading the spring campaign for the label, and well, let's just say I'm glad we get GQ in the office so that I could tear the ads out and pin them to my billboard. Plus the latest issue has Christian Bale on the cover - bonus!

Once a crusher, always a crusher.

Studio 60 Gets 86ed

I could feel it coming. I mean, really. As soon as I got attached, I knew that it was going to be doomed. Like Carnivale - cancelled. And as an aside to HBO - I'm still wondering if Jonesy died. Like the perfume I wear - discontinued. Like the string of hairdressers I've left behind me in Wilmywood - lost, missing, abandoned, incarcerated. Studio 60 is airing its last episode tonight in favor of a replacement drama. A new mob show created by Paul Haggis of Crash fame. So tune in tonight and bid farewell to Danny and Matt, Harriet and Jordan. And Aaron Sorkin's brilliance. And sadly, sadly, my weekly installment of Bradley Whitford. Mondays just got more Mondayish.

More Potter Teasers

ABC Family is running the Potter films this weekend and enticing viewers by showing clips of the Order of the Phoenix during each film. Each clip is about 0:30 - definitely worth watching. Some of these cuts are in the HBO clip I linked the other day, but there's also some new material in here. Gary Oldman is so fantastic - I love how they've styled him for this film. Best comment comes from Daniel Radcliff in The Kiss clip when he says that he did a lot of courtesy gum-chewing beforehand.

The Story
Harry
Hermione
Ron
Professor Umbridge
Bellatrix LeStrange
Luna Lovegood
Director David Yates
Dumbledore's Army
The Order of the Phoenix
The Kiss
Sirius Black
Wands

Dial "I" for Internet

I recognize that the blog has been lagging of late. This is due to a combination of factors really. First there is the unfortunate disappearance of my slightly-borrowed speedy wireless internet connection. And then, there is the out-of-town factor, which, despite my having a laptop, always seems produce a lapse in blogging.

In order to remedy the first factor, I broke down and signed up for dial-up again. I know, I know. Only grandmothers use dial-up. But really. I am a single lady, and the bills pile up. I think I could downgrade my cable, but then I would lose my *ahem* inexplicably free HBO. And the return of Big Love is just around the corner.

It may be more arduous posting without the speedy wireless internet connection - *sniff*. But I'll muddle through somehow for the sake of the blog. All this to say that I now plan to reestablish my feverish blogging pace in order to tell you everything you never wanted to know about me.

Bloody Exciting

If the 58 second teaser trailer got you quivering in your robes, check out this video clip from the HBO Sneak Peek at Order of the Phoenix. At 3:50, it gives a little more behind-the-scenes footage and additional scenes not included in the teaser. Clearly, the plot of Phoenix is more complex than the ones before it, and the older actors are enjoying the darker material. The sets look amazing. Bellatrix looks wicked scary. And I think Luna is perfect. It's all very promising. Makes me want to go home and start reading the book for the...well, let's not mention how many times I've read the book.

Fake Comedy - It's a Tragedy

The other night I came across the movie Prime on HBO. You may remember this movie - it came out last year and stars Uma Thurman as a wealthy power-exec in Manhattan with a few abandonment issues over her ex-husband who cheated on and left her. But she's working things out with her therapist - played by Meryl Streep - when she falls in love with David, a 24-year-old painter - played by Bryan Greenberg - more than 10 years younger than her - and Streep's son to boot. And wackiness ensues, right?

I caught the movie about halfway through, so I can't attest to how much hilarity the first hour held. But as for the second half, I can tell you I didn't come as close to cracking a smile as shedding a tear. By the way, consider this your official spoiler alert - the rest of this post will disclose the ending of the movie.

The previews for this movie were a montage of awkward situations, like Meryl Streep diving out of sight in Pottery Barn to preserve her role as Thurman's therapist when the happy couple is lurking in the bedding section just across the way. In fact, the movie poster bills it "A Therapeutic New Comedy" and shows Streep with a slapstick look of shock and disapproval on her face.

But the truth was that Uma Thurman was in a truly heartbreaking situation. And when Streep reveals who she is, Thurman loses her therapist, Streep her patient, and the mother-son relationship is left in shambles. After a string of break ups and reuniting, Thurman and Greenberg's characters decide to call it quits - after all, Thurman definitely wants a baby and Greenberg has too much life to live to be complicated by love and family.

I might have enjoyed this movie if I hadn't anticipated being in stitches. But as it was, I kept waiting for the faint hope to blossom into resolution with some witty dialogue and big hugs at the end. Instead, I was left out in the cold with Greenberg, looking through a cafe window at Thurman who looked rather wan and sad and then fade to dark.

I felt the same way about In Good Company, starring Topher Grace and Dennis Quaid. Even its tagline, "He's rich, young and handsome. He's in love with you and he's your dad's boss." promises a movie of comedic situation and clever comebacks. In the end, you're left feeling so desperately sad for Grace's character - whose life is never quite as funny as the movie tries to make it - and with a fragile hope that he's finally found some direction. But a comedy it is not.

This false billing is such an annoyance. I want to know what I'm watching. And I'm not going to be turned off by a movie just because it doesn't deliver sketch comedy on a platter. I'm a girl of varied tastes - I can handle the drama. But if you tell me it's a comedy, I better laugh so hard I cry. Not just cry.

Mrs & Mrs. Zzzzzzzzzzz

Dear Brad and Angelina,
I know that the whole world thinks that your the sexiest couple on the planet and that everything you do is terribly fascinating. Although, Brad, I resent your need to grow your hair out and be pouty (i.e. Legends of the Fall and Troy)and pass it off as good acting. And, Angelina, your lips frankly scare me a bit. Along with your passionate feelings for your brother. But here I am on a lazy Thursday night and Mr. & Mrs. Smith just happens to be on HBO, so I'm watching.

I think this movie is supposed to be funny. Because assassins are funny. I have no idea what your characters' names are, but I'm finding that it's really irrelevant because this is really not so much a movie as it is a fictionalized documentary about you, Brad and Angelina, and how sexy and irresistible you find each other. (Oh, oh, here's the poignant moment when you can't bear to kill each other. Snooze.) I'm so bored by watching you alternately hit each other and make out. I hope you donated all the money you made from this movie to UNICEF. You sure didn't deserve it.

Kisses & Punches,
Ashley

P.S. I find it utterly disturbing that while you two were getting it on, Vince Vaughn was standing outside your trailer devising a plan to be the rebound man. I imagine you all standing at craft services...

Vince: So, Jen...?

Brad: Yeah, yeah, I'm done with that.

Vince: Do you mind if I...?

Brad: (Bagel with lox in hand) No, man. It's all you. I'm going to adopt Angie's kids and wear skull caps in Africa. Cheers, man.

Play It Again, Sam

I am a lover of reruns. For awhile, I religiously watched the back-to-back episodes of “Golden Girls” on Lifetime at 7 and 7:30. I could watch the episodes again and again, even if I’d seen them two or three times. There’s something comforting to me about knowing how it ends. I do this with other television shows (“Sex & the City”), books (insert romance novel title here) and movies. Lots of movies. I have watched Bridget Jones’s Diary approximately 500 times. I can finish watching it and instantly restart it in an almost unbreakable addictive cycle. I can almost do a complete voiceover of Clue. And I could step in for John Bender at any given moment in The Breakfast Club.

Then there are those movies that I watch every time I catch them on TV, no matter how many times I’ve seen them. Anything directed by John Hughes. Dirty Dancing. When Harry Met Sally. In these cases, it’s because I love the movie. But there are other times when some subtle message in those frames-between-frames tells me I must finish the movie. In his book Seinlanguage, Jerry Seinfeld says this is a basic difference between the sexes. Women want to nurture a show, help it grow. Men are like, “No, no, he’s stupid, she’s stupid, keep going, what else you got?” But me? I need to see it through to fruition. Like Titanic. It’s three hours, but when HBO was running it incessantly last month, I watched it to the end every time I caught it. I often have this problem with Jurassic Park. For awhile, The Fugitive. So, what’s your favorite re-runner? And your nomination for best hidden message to NOT LOOK AWAY from the screen?

She's Guilty, Part II

I was supposed to watch She's the Man last week with Mel & Penelope. But we were unavoidably detained by wine and blue corn tortilla chips and discussing the devil at the office and the decline in good shows on HBO these days. So anyway, sorry, ladies, but I couldn't wait. And I'd just like to say: I wanna be Amanda Bynes when I grow up.